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Greetings, my fellow port swillers!

Ol’ Robbo saw this article early this morning:  Burlington (VT) City Council Opposes F-35 Fighter Jets At Airport.

WCAX-TV reports the council voted unanimously on Monday in favor of a resolution that opposes the basing of any nuclear-capable aircraft at the airport in South Burlington. The resolution also requests that Mayor Miro Weinberger, Gov. Phil Scott and Vermont’s congressional delegation tell the Department of Defense that the F-35s are not welcomed in Burlington.

The article actually filled me with a weird sense of nostalgia.  Ol’ Robbo is old enough to remember the “Nuclear-Free Zone” fad back during the Reagan years, with numerous city councils and other bodies feeling that with a mere paper resolution they could somehow opt out in the event the Cold War went hot. (Virtue-signaling is, of course, really nothing new.)

Indeed, we even had a movement at the People’s Glorious Soviet of Middletown, CT.  A wave of hysteria swept over the campus, the fear being that if Ivan had a go at the sub pens over to New London, one of their missiles might come down on us inadvertently, or else we might get caught in the fallout even if they hit their target.  Hence, somebody organized a petition to have Dear Ol’ Wes declared a No-Nukes Zone.  (There was a concurrent petition to demand that the campus clinic stock cyanide capsules, because if the Russkies dropped the Big One, what was the point of living any longer?  They got that idea from the kids over at Brown.)

Because everybody knew that a Strongly-Worded Resolution would shield the place from attack.  Because reasons.  Because that sumbitch Ronnie “Ray-Gun”. Because shut up.

I mocked the whole silly biznay with gusto.  (You could still do so back then without fear of getting hauled up before a campus “hate-crime” tribunal.)  As a matter of fact, as staff cartoonist for the lone conservative paper on campus, I created a panel the upshot of which was that a brown paper bag placed over one’s head made every bit as effective a Personal Nuclear-Free Zone as did any campus-wide resolution in fending off the realities of any actual exchange with Ivan.

I was rather proud of the thing, although as you might imagine it didn’t win me many friends.

Don’t remember whether anything came of the anti-nuke resolution.  I do recall that the administration, very sensibly, declined to stock suicide pills.


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August 2019