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Greetings, my fellow port swillers!

Yes, as I’m sure you all heard this afternoon, Bryce Harper signed with the Phillies for 13 years and $330 million.  Of course the news broke about 45 minutes after I teased a colleague in Philly that it looked like he was going to the West Coast instead.  The Baseball Gods are sadists.

Whelp, it’s over and done with and good luck to him.  Of course, Ol’ Robbo would have been mighty happy if the Giants had been able to sneak in and grab him, but there it is.

Frankly, I think Philly paid way too much and that the contract is too long.  (He’ll be, what, pushing 40 when it expires).

When Harps is hot, he’s very hot, but he’s also very streaky and capable of going into long slumps.  His fielding really isn’t all that, either.  (Cut off man? What cut off man?)  Finally, he’s something of a diva in the clubhouse, or so I hear.  I suppose the Phils figure they can cure him on the field and tame him off it.  We’ll see.

I’ll be very interested to see what kind of reception Harps gets from his new fan base, too.  Are they excited? Skeptical? Indifferent?  I’m sure of one thing: If he underperforms the way he can sometimes they will not hesitate for an instant to turn on him and release the Boo Birds. For a city of “Brotherly Love”, that place is pretty damned unforgiving.

As to us Nats fans? I’d say it was an amicable breakup.  (I certainly don’t feel any particular pang because I don’t think we’re really going to suffer at all for his loss, and also because I never really did warm up to him the way I did with, say, Zimm or Anthony “Tony Two-Bags” Rendon.)  I’d be very surprised if he got the raspberry on his first reappearance here.  It’s just too bad, as I say, that we’re going to have to see him so often.

UPDATE: On the other hand, it is said that a smile is a frown turned upside down.  Have I mentioned that we’re getting a fabulous new on-field sportscaster babe this year? Yes, yes we are!

Anyhoo, that’s that.  What else is there to say except




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February 2019