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“I’m Your Huckleberry…”

Greetings, my fellow port swillers, and happy Feast of St. Nicholas!

Have you slapped an Arian yet today?  No? Well there’s still plenty of time.

Actually, if the good Bishop of Myra were here today, he’d have so many different slap-worthy heretical targets, his arm probably would fall off.  Indeed, I’d pay good money to see what he would have made of the first hipster-doofus he came across who said, “Well, like, Jesus was just this really enlightened guy, you know? And I’m sure he’d be a Democratic Socialist now….”

Might be easier of course, just to release the Krampus.

Actually, Ol’ Robbo saw a very nice thing in keeping with St. Nicholas’s more charitable side today:  I was standing in line at my usual sammich shop when I noticed a decrepit old woman, who had been loitering around out front, slowly make her way in the door.  (She was hunched over, had a cast on one leg and a cane, and was mumbling to herself continually.)  In so doing, she hung up a young fellah who was coming in behind her.  Rayther than going around her and pretending she wasn’t there, he very patiently waited until she was through the door.  Then he sat her down at the nearest table, explained the menu to her (which I’m sure she could neither see nor read up on the wall), and then went and bought her some lunch.

Bless you, dude.  You did good.

UPDATE:  Same sammich shop today, different decrepit old man, and I was the one coming up to the door behind him.  Since he asked me to help him to a meal and not for money, I took him in and set him up with a sammich and chips.

Ol’ Robbo is not very good at this kind of face-to-face thing.  I do most of my charity through donations to food banks, Goodwill, and the like.  Some years ago I tried to make an effort on the more personal lines, and was amazed at how many times I got snarled at for offering food or drink but not money.  So I don’t do it any more.

So today, another customer in line offered me five bucks to, as he put it, “help defray” this guy’s meal.  I politely turned him down and he seemed surprised and even a little offended.  Was this wrong of me?


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December 2017