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Greetings, my fellow port swillers!

As regular friends of the decanter may be aware, ol’ Robbo drives a soft-top ’03 Jeep Wrangler.  As more closely observant friends may know, I keep the side and back panels off/open in all possible seasons.  One of several reasons for this is that I like to hear what’s going on around me as well as seeing it.

Whelp, recently I can’t help noticing a surge in some kind of mechanical innovation in the more la-dee-dah cars on the road.  Seems that at stop signs and red lights, their engines cut out, either altogether or else sliding into some kind of sleep mode.  In either case, when they need to engage again, there is some kind of mini-starter motor.  When activated, it makes a distinct gervoosh sort of noise.

This irritates ol’ Robbo on two distinct grounds.

First, simple mechanical noises can play the part of “ear-worm” just as readily as any bad musick.  (Ol’ Robbo would never throw out examples here like “Su-Sudio” or “Billy, Don’t Be A Hero” or “Don’t Worry, Be Happy“.  You can thank me later.) Said gervooshing is getting on my nerves for its own sake.

Second, there is something repugnant to me about the idea of gratuitously flipping the on/off switch back and forth.  Somewhere in my education, it was impressed upon me that such needless mechanical tap-dancing simply wears out the parts more quickly.  I’m sure somebody has a reasoned, justified response in this instance, but I don’t care:  It still seems wrong to me.


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December 2015