Greetings, my fellow port swillers!
Ol’ Robbo was flipping idly through the assortment of “holiday” cards that have piled up on the side table by the front door of Port Swiller Manor this evening when he realized that, out of about thirty or so such cards we’ve received so far, only one of them took as its theme the celebration of the birth of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.
Most of the rest feature montages of family photos. My favorite is one that came in the shape of a Christmas tree ornament, complete with ribbon for hanging on a convenient branch – to honor, I suppose – our closeness.* Its computer-generated mailing label spelled the Robbo family name wrong.
I throw this out as observation, not condemnation. Truth of the matter is that, as Port Swiller Communications Director, Mrs. Robbo took the same route with our own cards (although she prided herself on actually hand-addressing the envelopes). When I raised some mild concern, she replied that I was perfectly at liberty to send “real” Christmas cards to anybody I like, including my imaginary internet friends, and good luck. Until I stepped up and started writing, however, I could stuff it.
Yes, Dear.
To give you an idea of my “stepping up” is such matters, I’ve still barely made a dent in the set of Madonna and Child cards I bought a couple years ago.
Yes, I denounce myself.
* True story: The female of this couple was a classmate of Mrs. R in college and she and I went out on a blind date literally the evening before I met Mrs. R. Said date was a first-class disaster and I believe said classmate actually doesn’t even remember it.
7 comments
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December 17, 2014 at 5:09 am
Vicki
What, you didn’t like the cat card I sent? And I received the addressed by hand Christmas card yesterday, thankyewverramuch. Very nice!
December 17, 2014 at 9:10 am
the gripping hand
Imaginary internet friends?! I represent that remark!
December 17, 2014 at 7:55 pm
Robbo
Oh, I liked kittehs…..
December 17, 2014 at 9:53 pm
Spad13
Of course she remembers the bad date. Why do you think the family name is misspelled?
December 18, 2014 at 8:50 am
Robbo
Derp!
December 19, 2014 at 11:06 am
nightfly
I, too, must denounce myself. One of the jokes in my family upon my marriage to the Ladybug was that finally, somebody would remember to mail birthday and holiday cards on time.
In fact, 29 cards were handed to me in sealed, addressed envelopes just this Wednesday, with the command to deliver them to the postal service forthwith.
Merry Christmas to you and yours, sir, from one of the pretend people in the glowing box.
December 19, 2014 at 9:19 pm
Robbo
Lifts glass.