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Greetings, my fellow port swillers!

Recently, ol’ Robbo has been grumbling about the Port Swiller Manor coffee-maker, an old Mr. Coffee 12-cup that we have had at least eight or ten years now.  I never learned to love it because it always was a very finicky machine.  Unless conditions were to its exact liking, it would clog up and start spilling coffee out the top of the basket and all over the counter.  It had been doing this more and more lately, despite my constant fiddling with the spring release to try and clear the flow path into the decanter.  Hence my grumbling.

mrcoffeeWell, today Mrs. R surprised me by bringing home a new Mr. Coffee, specifically a Model BVMC-SJX33GT.  Unlike the old one, which was a boring monotone white, this is black with imitation chrome fronting.  AND it has both blue and green indicator lights.  How cool is that?

Indeed, the first thought that occurred to ol’ Robbo was that the thing looked like it had been designed for use aboard the Death Star.  Various quotes started to wend their way through what passes for my braims:

“TK-421, why aren’t you on your coffee break?”  

“Don’t be too proud of this technological terror you’ve constructed. The ability to destroy a planet is insignificant next to the power of a good cup of café Cubano.”

“3PO, do you copy?  Shut down all the coffee-makers on the detention level!!”

“I grow tired of asking so this will be the last time:  Where is the Rebel Espresso Roast?”

And so on.

Yes, I am easily amused.   Yes, it is probably just as well that nobody saw me standing in the kitchen for ten minutes, staring at the coffeemaker and chuckling to myself.

Anyhoo, Old Mr. Coffee was summarily given the heave-ho, and New Mr. Coffee installed in his spot.  I look forward to the new regime.


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March 2014