I have read numerous “scientific” articles which claim that while stink bugs are a household infestation nuisance during the wintah months, once summah comes around they move outside to do whatever it is that stink bugs do au natural.

My friends, I am here to tell you that those articles are incorrect.

The neighborhood of Port Swiller Manor reached spring-like conditions a good five or six weeks ago.  And Heat Miser appeared with a whoop and a holler this past week.  Yet it seems that, if anything, the number of stink bugs in the house has increased.


Perhaps I’m bitter about this because in my early-awake drowsiness this morning I felt something prickling on my elbow and gave it a hearty whack.  Turned out to be a stink bug.  And he stinked me real good.  Yuck.

On the other hand, I suppose I can’t complain too much.  Something similar happened to sistah during our misspent yoot back in Texas, only it turned out to be a scorpion.  Got her three times on the hand and face before she even really knew what was happening, as I recall.

Still, we hates stink bugs.