Middle Gel:  Why the heck do we have to learn the Pythagorean theorem?  When am I ever going to need the Pythagorean theorem?  Why can’t they teach us practical things like how to keep a bank balance or how to buy a house?

Self:  Just learn it.  You never know when some mugger might jump out of an alley, put a gun to your head and demand an explanation of it.

M.G.: DAAA-aaad!

Self:  Hey, if it happens, don’t say I didn’t warn you.