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Middle Gel: Why the heck do we have to learn the Pythagorean theorem? When am I ever going to need the Pythagorean theorem? Why can’t they teach us practical things like how to keep a bank balance or how to buy a house?
Self: Just learn it. You never know when some mugger might jump out of an alley, put a gun to your head and demand an explanation of it.
M.G.: DAAA-aaad!
Self: Hey, if it happens, don’t say I didn’t warn you.

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